Wednesday, May 5, 2010

~* Ouch-ing Badly *~

Perhaps, this might be the worst time of the year with so much pressure coming from different aspects of life at the same time. When i am typing this out, my eyes are so swollen until i don't see my double eyelids in the mirror after crying out loud for more than an hour last night.

Last night, i faced the exact same thing that happened two years ago. Although i had been the one making that stupid suggestion alone, yesterday it was both of us who wanted to make the same stupid suggestion. Only when i had got my mind straight, i realised it would be a terribly wrong thing to do.

If it had to take place, i would definitely feel worse than two years ago and it would be the worst. It did not have to be that way. And i definitely don't want to feel the same thing and go through the same situation i had two years back. And i definitely don't want to put him the same situation again like i had been. And both of us still have a long way to go. Most important is we still feel the same way about each other.

My eyes are so tired right now and headache strikes.

My patience has been tested since this morning. I did my best. At the end of the day, i got my worst. What is left now is 0% patience, 100% anger and frustration. Nobody's fault. It was only the timing itself fooled me.

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